Pigs in a Playpen

We are all roasting through a Great Heatwave in NJ.

It's too hot for Puffkins

Yesterday we twiddled our thumbs wondering how to pass the Saturday: Jersey Shore? long drive...Mall? we don't need to buy anything. After a particularly hot hazy week we didn't feel inspired to do much. The heat was so strong and humid, we felt a little nausea from the heat and decided to do something local The County Fair! The county fair reminds me so much of Charlotte's Web where Wilbur the pig goes before he is supposed to be turned into bacon.

100 degrees

Hot steamy weather is great for picnics, baskets filled with goodies like potato salad, watermelon and of course fried chicken. Delicious fried chicken could be called

Firecracker Chicken

Buffalo Bill

Pluckers Palace

Poulet

Granddaddy chicken

Big breasts

Oh wait, now what do we name Dolly Parton? And what is she doing in the hen house? She must have discovered this is Hillbilly heaven. 

I would not fry this one. Anyone resembling Einstein, even a chicken, should be spared.

Little chickens being born

We strolled around the Small Animal display and ran into very prim looking children gently playing with a giant rat. And they say this is a first world nation....

His name is Remy, he comes from Paris and he makes the best ratatouille. 

I steered clear of the rat, it reminded me of the dancing ones by the 34th street metro in NYC. Everyone waiting for the metro watched them in fascination as the rats washed their face in a puddle of mud. I shivered, shook and had a guy watch me like if I were totally nuts. The last time I checked rats were still on humans enemy list. Seriously, they killed millions of people with the Black Plague (cats ended the plague) and we are allowing our children to play with rats? America....what are we coming to?!


While I pondered that thought, I strolled over to some cuter small animals: bunnies. Everyone loves a good bunny. These little floppy eared friends were all scared out of their wits to be at the fair, over heated but still as adorable as a...bunny on a sunny day.

Awwww

As big as Bentley

His name is Fatty too. Shhh...Fatty my cat doesn't know. 

A bottle of iced water is this bunny's best friend. 

There were other cuties in sight:

Baby chickens

A toddler stares down a turkey. This made me scared for the child. Couldn't someone pull him away?

There was a dog show

And sweet horses

Save your pennies!

A baby calf called Moo

Then I met my friend. He was in a playpen chomping away at a piece of corn.

YUM

Please, allow me to finish my meal before you interview me. 

Baby goat and mama goat.

life

Jemimia puddle duck

It was so hot we felt nausea and I wasn't surprised to see that there were no children on the rotating swing ride. It sat empty and depressed but would have made kids sick if they rode it in the heat.

Almost as cute as the bunny

A piece of me wanted to ride this.

can I have the roof, please?

Then, the ride with the most children shocked the socks off of me. Seriously, America, this is not the way to teach patriotism, peace and democracy...

the tank ride for the toddlers

"Daddy, what is a tank for?" "Destroying nations and people, squirt"

This is how I feel about the tank ride: it is no bueno.

Horses and kids keeping cool with a giant fan. 

The bee keeper

Did you know that when bees have no queen they look for a local bee to be crowned? Local bees from the same tribe take 7 days to adjust to life. Foreign queens take up to 30 days of lounging around doing absolutely nothing before starting to work. I think the same goes for humans but locals take 3 months to adjust to a move and foreign folk take 3 years.

They have no queen.

Then we ran into some bunnies that were having a fight. The short brown male, named Berlusconi, wanted to make desperate passionate love with the large white bunny named Heidi Klum. Like most females, Heidi didn't want a short man chasing her tail so she ignored him.

Berlusconi didn't like to be ignored so he pretended to cuddle with Hedi Klum but it was a plot of revenge.

When she was fully convinced that it was a creepy cuddle and nothing more, Berlusconi attacked! He bit her so hard he pulled out her soft white fur and made her scream from the pain. Mean short bunny....

The respective countries tried to make diplomatic treaties over this misunderstanding.

But to no avail. Berlusconi remains insistent on chasing the tail of Heidi Klum.

This is a story we will not know the end of...

After a few hours at the fair we felt puckered out like this guy.

And decided to go home. At home we discovered that the heat makes everyone a little edgy, ready to swat out a stinging blow. The kittens were feeling capricious and cranky so they sat between the doors protecting their territories and smacking the evening away.

Don't you even look at me that way, Fatty.

Swat-swat-swat!

Ears back! It's ON!

The air conditioned kitchen is mine! You don't deserve to come in here!

Vai a morire amazzatto!....they change languages when it gets nasty. 

Taking a break. They are old after all. But Fatty isn't done. 

swat! Swat! SWAT!

We ended the evening with a generous slice of cold watermelon and that hit the spot.

In other news. I think summer is coming to an end and I should start squirreling away to get ready for General Winter to return. I see him smiling on the horizon, past the hair of Snooki...