Beach Boys and Bar Brawls

Change was in the air this weekend. 

We checked the weather forecast, it indicated to storms on Sunday, so we booked it to the Jersey Shore to spend a day relaxing on the beach. This time we went to Spring Lake, a more fancy area of the Jersey Shore where you are likely to see more nannies than moms with the children. It is amazing how one town of the shore is golden and the other one like a rusty 1960's town.

 The waves in Spring Lake are enormous and harsh so I opted to stay safely under the beach umbrella.

 I noticed that all other women were opting to do the same, except for the occasional woman who had to tinkle. 

Might I just add how obvious it is when women try to discreetly pee on you in the ocean...It is the most annoying thing to be in the water enjoying yourself and you see a woman tiptoe desperately into the cold water right next to you. That woman has been busy sun tanning all day but at this moment when you are having a great time she comes three feet away from you, the water gets warm and she pretends to wash her legs just to have some fresh sea-salt water on her thighs. When we went to Cape May I got an international pee bath, there was a German lady to my right, a Korean grandma to my left and an Italian-American lady behind me. It is of no surprise that something in the water bit my foot, I bet the critter didn't appreciate the tinkle fest. I don't know what to say or suggest when needing to tinkle at the beach but it's not polite to pee on the lady next to you...I thought we humans moved passed this millions of years ago. 

Anyway, change was in the air. I watched the chef go flying into the waves and hoped he would be fine because the lifeguards didn't look like the sharpest tools in the shed. While keeping one eye on the chef as he battled the waves, I opened my healthy beach snack: a packet of Oreo cookies and noticed something very strange:

It is a sign, for what I haven't figured it out yet, but a sign.

I pondered the meaning of the inside-out Oreo while watching the head of my chef go up and down and into the ocean. 

Now I see him

Now I don't see him...where is he..

ah! there he is. I will eat good again.

maybe not...he is going down again. How can he possibly enjoy this?

Will I ever eat pasta with clams again?

Yes, I think I will!

 I decided to get up to keep a better eye on my chef.

Man and wave

Floating in the Atlantic

being eaten by the wave

And diving in again

There he goes.

There were a group of wild little boys fiercely attacking the waves with all the energy and happiness bottled up in their little limbs. 

We chilled on the snobby beach for a while then decided to drive by Belmar, the hang-out spot for the Jersey Shore cast and see if we could be entertained with any trouble. The way there was cute, we went from the fancy town to a 1960's style town. 

Pasquariello Real Estate

Vinnie's Convenience

I like this one, Milk and More. I want the sign for my kitchen.

As good luck would have it, we did run into trouble. 

We drove past D'Jais, a skeevy bar full of tattooed drunk girls and mammoth muscled guys. 

As we approached we saw police arrive in a rush to break up a fight. The little chef's eyes lit up with delight at watching a wild girl getting pulled away from a fight...I sighed...he quickly and seriously said, "It's an anthropological experience. Do we want to park and go see what happens?!" Oh sure, a study on the science of humanity...But we were too late, other drivers quickly parked to watch the anthropological fight break out and the cops struggle to maintain the brawling group of wildly slapping women and gorilla sized bouncers. Maybe we should reserve tickets for the next opening night Gala. I'll have to carefully select my evening dress for the occasion. 

The next night it rained and poured for hours so I decided to catch up on some 1980's movies that I thought I should have watched by my next birthday. I had really high hopes for Fatal Attraction. I was hoping it would be some great feminist film where the woman comes to accept her identity and  independence. 

Fatty wanted to have his head in the DVD drive

Part 1

Hello, I am psycho.

Nice to meet you, Psycho. You seem to be an independent woman aware of all of her potential.

Yes, she most certainly is aware of her potential...

Apparently all famous 1980's films are not all as up to par as Nora Ephron films. Some movies are worth missing I guess. Fatty didn't even like it. He scurried under the couch towards the end. Sometimes the cat knows best. When in doubt stick to Jane Austen, she never fails.