Going Postal

This title has been in my mind since August 1 when I spent nearly 5 hours in the Post office, and managed to get whiplash somewhere in the middle of that day when the bus I was on almost crashed into my landlady. Small town I say. I thought, nah, why blog about a bad day at the post office? Then, every experience with the post office turned out to be a bad one.

(Not to say that US offices work great, the Registrar's Office for college could easily take first place! Rudeness, laziness, arrogance and lack of interest abounds in small offices with poor lighting and stale air.)

I started to notice that it wasn't just bad for me though, it was bad for everyone there and even the employees were on the brink of walking out. Often they would leave a line of 100 people to go have a smoke. Letters of complaint? Forget about it! They don't care, nor does the manager or any other employee. Why? Because you need them, so they do as they please.

I'm not sure why the post system here is bad but it reminds me of a menopausal co-worker from Baltimore: one day she was great filled with energy, positive and got so much work done, then the rest of the month she was a beast that everyone hated but needed since she had worked there forever and knew all the ins and outs not to mention all the secrets that the deans hid from the president. The Italian post office is a very angry menopausal woman most of the month. You hate her but need her, when she works great you are suspicious and scared that something could go wrong at any moment. When others are getting their heads chopped off you wince in pain.

This is what you can do at the post office and why you need it:

1. You pay your bills there. If the Post Office system crashes and you are late, oh well.
2. Grandma and Grandpa get their pension there every month to pay their bills, get food and survive.
3. You can mail things.
4. You can apply for a visa to stay in Italy.
5. They sell children's books, diet books and stamp collector albums for anyone needing a last minute gift.

Before I let you in on the 5 most horrible moments with the post office I will give you my top 5, just for the sake of being fair.

1. Applying for my visa to stay was made clear and easy by the Sicilian post office lady when I first got here. She explained each step, where the main immigration office was and was friendly. Since then I love it when my number gets called at her booth.

2. I got tickled at Christmas time when I got to send Christmas cards to the US, Ireland, Italy and Mexico. It made me feel close to everyone so far.

3. I sent a small package to the US, and my once again favorite Sicilian lady changed the weight on the package by 6 oz. so that it would get the smaller charge.

4. ...thinking hard...there must be something else...OH! I had the pleasure of a long 2 hour conversation with a 94 year old lady while we were both waiting our turn. Not only did she give me marital advice and tell me how to cook horse meat but she gave me great company like a good meal to a hungry person. I thought about everything she told me for a few days. Life during World War II, her son dying, making it on her own, advice for living in a small town and how to cook horse steak.

5. I jumped for joy when my package of Dunkin Donuts coffee arrived from my dad in Florida.

Now for the very inconvenient truth.Most of the time there is a line but more often than not you wait more than one hour, get someone cranky and they tell you to fill out a form and get back in line. Or the machines are frozen for your type of transaction. Here are my top 5 "going postal" moments with the postal and delivery system (I am including yesterday's UPS fun):

1. Paying the bills fiasco: August 1 I went to the post office with the bill to pay it on time and avoid a late feel like a responsible person. The place had a line like for 1 dollar iPods at Wal-Mart on Black Thursday. My number was 80 numbers behind the one being called. I sat and waited for a few hours before leaving. The grocery store and bakery close 3 hours for lunch and I needed to get food. So I left to buy our daily bread, went home then walked back at 5 PM and there was a new line. The Postal lady was going postal yelling at people that they should pay their bills earlier. What bothered me the most was that there were several people well over 80 there to get their pension. They looked small and vulnerable like they should be walking in a garden or napping and not waiting in a terribly long line for their pension.

2. Amazon order: I ordered some boots from Amazon in December. February rolled around and they hadn't arrived. Amazon said wait. I finally asked the postal delivery man if he could look for them in the office. One of his eyes wobbled, he asked me where I was from, that I didn't look American and said he would look for my boots. Two weeks later, at 8 AM my doorbell rings frantically. I see it is him with my boots and he says they were in another delivery truck the entire time. 3 months to get boots...

3. VIP letters: I wrote a letter to the president's wife, the queen of England and Eepone, a loving purring cat that had surgery and looked sad. She needed a get well letter. Armed with civic satisfacion I marched to the postal office and gave my letters. I paid, waited for my change, and it was short by a lot. The man said there was nothing he could do. I got so angry I forgot to speak Italian, called my fiance and he came. The postal worker, somewhat nervously but with a smirk showed my fiance the three letters I meant to send. It was a humiliating but funny moment. We did get the change back and Eep got her letter.


4. Cheesy situation:  A lovely lady sent us a package of cheese in my fiances name. The delivery man with the wobbly eye wouldn't give it to me for 4 days because it wasn't in my name. We had to wait for Saturday to go to the post office, stand in the long line, and get the cheese. Needless to say when we opened the box it smelled like someone cut the cheese.

5. UPS: they have delivered 4 times to my house. The short delivery guys is from this neighborhood. I had a package sent UPS international (expensive) and he didn't deliver. Why? My address didn't exist he said. And you know with UPS deliveries you have to wait all day from 8AM-6PM. The most positive thing about this is that I had an argument with him, over the phone, and for the first time felt confident and capable of expressing myself in Italian. Italian phrases, expressions, emotion...it felt great to cross the language barrier and find my voice.